Ain’t life grand? December 14, 2009
Posted by Sharny in : Essay,Life,School,Thoughts,Work , add a commentSo this is the updatery and depressive post that will explain why I’m posting here again and why I have relaunched durka. It’s not exactly going to be much fun but I kinda want to write some things not addressed to myself and explain the sudden reappearence of posting.
As planned, this year I started higher education at Nottingham University on the 21st of September, after moving in the day before. Things didn’t exactly have the easiest start, you hear tales of university being so much better than school before hand and people really finding themself and such. I didn’t get so lucky. All of it was a massive struggle and it was all a very depressing and downtreading time. As a few weeks went by and routine began to set in things did get better, as they surely do.
Then, something rather unexpected happened. Essentially, in the space of a day I realised that Chemistry was not the course for me. It was a real epiphany moment, and not a moment I wanted to have. There were other doubts around it, including ones about whether being at University was even the right thing for me to be doing. Through talking and thinking and thinking and talking some more I got some plan of what to do.
Able to buy corkscrews August 19, 2008
Posted by Sharny in : Life,Music,Thoughts,Work , add a commentAmong a few other things of course…
Wow, finally 18, I almost thought it would never happen. One thing that I had forgotten about which I quite liked was this:
The following is an e-mail from the past, composed on Wednesday, September 20, 2006, and sent via FutureMe.org
- – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - – - -Hi. I figured this would be an appropriate time to send another of these, once every 2 years seems good. Once I get these my future will be sealed, hopefully good A-levels and off to university. Wow, this will go past so much work and so many decisions, kinda funny to think. Once this arrives the future shall literally be unfolding out before me and I hope that 6th form has been a very enjoyable time. Well, not gonna make it an essay, at this point I’m 1 month from quitting RS except for the fun aspects.
Oh yeah, happy 18th birthday too
Essentially I was right, my A levels got me into Uni and my future is pretty sealed and even better than I could have imagined back then, I didn’t expect what I got. Having enjoyed receiving it so much I immediately went and wrote one for this time next year which I think will be saved till then, I can’t imagine things will be as better than I thought then, if they were I would probably explode with happiness.
Also, I don’t know why but I’m really connected with Dredg today, I bought their album A Catch Without Arms on the strength of…um…0 songs, I think I just listened to the preview and bought it, a risky move really but it turned out good. Something about the style of it just works with my mood today, I’m personally categorizing it (along with a couple other bands I’m checking out recently) as “Indie Prog”, which probably isn’t very accurate given that I don’t know enough about Indie to really comment, although I like to think I know it when I hear it. With Dredg I hear indie but also kinda atmospheric proggy stuff, which makes it sound cool.
Given this post is mostly ramble anyway, I’m also getting on ok at my first jarb. Things were pretty darn scary at first but they’ve settled down a bit now and I’m getting comfortable. I still seem to think they’re gonna turn around and realise they didn’t want to hire me at all, I dunno really why I find it so difficult to think that a company would actually employ me but there we go…
I must away, raving calls…
Judged August 14, 2008
Posted by Sharny in : Life,School , add a commentIt was a pretty surreal experience really, going in, getting the envelope, opening it to find an ominous note to see my tutor, which I knew for sure meant I hadn’t hit my grades for everything. The first thing I read was my AQA statement, which gave me a B in both Chemistry and Psychology, the former of which was a B by no less than one UMS point. Then I found the OCR one, which stated the now obvious result of a C. This was entirely predictable, I hadn’t really felt that a B in Physics was likely at all, I was however hoping for an A in psychology to make up for it but unfortunately that didn’t happen.
So from there I consulted my tutor who told me that he had been unable to get an answer out of Nottingham (their offer was BBB) as I needed to check my UCAS track before they would even talk to me. With this information in hand I was just eager to get out of there and find out. If I were a different person or the results had meant clearly that I had been accepted I would have liked to have found out how well quite a few people did, not to mention thank some of my teachers but the need to confirm my future and the fear involved with talking to people led me home as quickly as I could get there.
I quickly found a UCAS letter stating my application number thingymawhatsit and logged in to track, which was surprisingly responsive given that so many people accross the country would have been logging into it around that time. There, on the first page, was the message.
” Congratulations! Your place at The University of Nottingham (N84) to study Chemistry with a Research Year in Industry (F104) has been confirmed. ”
Sweet relief.
The hour of judgement August 13, 2008
Posted by Sharny in : Life,School , add a commentIn less than 12 hours I’m going to have my A level results in my hands. Nothing so big in my life has rested on one thing in the way this is. Although there are plenty of other people accross the country in an almost identical position to me I still am very alone with this, none of my friends have quite the same pressure on them. Sure, GCSEs have importance but they are much more flexible, if you don’t get quite what is asked of you often you will be allowed in anyway, perhaps with more terms.
Having known this feeling of dread ever since my last exam, never has it been greater than now.
There is a huuuge ramble potential for this post but I’m going to have to restrain myself. Ultimately, nothing I can do can change my results (at the moment, I could get a re-mark) and it’s not like there is anything I need to know about what will happen if I do/don’t get my grades.
I’m just gonna try and get some sleep and hope beyond hope that this will go my way…
The Penultimate Day June 18, 2008
Posted by Sharny in : Life,Misc , add a commentThis is the day before my last exam. By tomorrow lunch time all the worrying, the procrastination and sporadic work will be over and I must simply wait. Wait to find out my fate, to find out what I have the horrible feeling I already know the answer to.
I really don’t like this feeling…
That time June 16, 2008
Posted by Sharny in : Life,School,Scraps , add a commentTomorrow begins my final week of exams. My most important week of exams. The exams that could well decided my future. Unless the universities decide they suddenly don’t need grades they will decide my future.
Let’s just say I could definitely be more prepared.
Of course, times like this make me all looky at my life time. And listen to music at a higher than normal volume, that too.
There is really no point worrying, I know this, it doesn’t really seem to stop me doing…whatever it is I’m doing. At least once this is over I really have very little to worry about and I think it’s about time I got some worry free moments. Well, I have to find myself a job but that’s another story.
One nice thing at the moment is that I have been given the job offer by my Ski resort so that is one more hurdle down, only one big one and one small one left. The big one is the visa process. Gee that’s gonna be fun…
